Canopy's Green Mountainsides and Wildflowers

A Dream Pang

2011-11-30T14:22:00.002+08:00

by Robert Frost

I had withdrawn in forest, and my song
Was swallowed up in leaves that blew away;
And to the forest edge you came one day
(this was my dream) and looked and pondered long,
But did not enter, though the wish was strong:
You shook your pensive head as who should say,
"I dare not--too far in his footsteps stray--
He must seek me would he undo the wrong."

Not far, but near, I stood and saw it all,
Behind low boughs the trees let down outside;
And the sweet pang it cost me not to call
and tell you that I saw does still abide.
But 'tis not true that thus I dwelt aloof,
For the wood wakes, and you are here for proof.

Batman and Spiderman

2011-09-26T09:19:00.002+08:00

I recently watched Spiderman and Dark Knight. I thought that Spiderman was more suitable for children and teenagers, while Dark Knight was more for adults. Spiderman deals with issues of identity, such as what a good person is and what power is for. While these are important and fundamental issues, at some point people have to resolve them and start doing stuff already. This is where ethical issues begin to crop up, like means vs ends, revenge etc, which are themes that Dark Knight explores.

Random quiz: Go with your first instincts

2011-08-09T10:16:00.001+08:00

1. FIRST, WRITE NUMBERS 1 THROUGH 11 IN A COLUMN
2. THEN, BESIDE NUMBERS 1 AND 2, WRITE DOWN ANY 2 NUMBERS YOU WANT
3. BESIDES THE 3 AND 7, WRITE DOWN THE NAMES OF MEMBERS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX
4. WRITE ANYONE'S NAME (LIKE FRIENDS OR FAMILY) IN THE 4TH, 5TH, AND 6TH SPOT
5. WRITE DOWN FOUR SONG TITLES IN 8, 9, 10, AND 11

1. YOU MUST TELL (THE NUMBER IN SPACE 2) PEOPLE ABOUT THIS GAME
2. THE PERSON IN SPACE 3 IS THE ONE YOU LOVE
3. THE PERSON IN 7 IS ONE YOU LIKE BUT CAN'T WORK OUT
4. YOU CARE MOST ABOUT THE PERSON YOU PUT IN 4
5. THE PERSON YOU NAME IN NUMBER 5 IS THE ONE WHO KNOWS YOU VERY WELL
6. THE PERSON YOU NAMED IN 6 IS YOUR LUCKY STAR
7. THE SONG IN 8 IS THE SONG THAT MATCHES WITH THE PERSON IN NUMBER 3
8. THE TITLE IN 9 IS THE SONG FOR THE PERSON IN 7
9. THE 10TH SPACE IS THE SONG THAT TELLS YOU MOST ABOUT YOUR MIND
10. AND 11 IS THE SONG TELLING HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT LIFE

Ender's Game, Page 1

2011-06-01T14:10:00.000+08:00

"Same with the sister. And there are doubts about him. He's too malleable. Too willing to submerge himself in someone else's will."
"Not if the other person is his enemy."
"So what do we do? Surround him with enemies all the time?"
"If we have to."

Quote of the day

2011-04-23T11:10:00.002+08:00

"Life always carries a fatal dimension and some hint of having fallen into a trap, except that this trap does not strangle us, but leaves to life a margin of decision and always permits us, out of the imposed situation, to achieve an elegant solution and to forge for ourselves a beautiful life." --Ortega y Gasset

"Do not panic"

2011-02-05T12:14:00.000+08:00

--Surely the most scary words a person could hear, unless spoken by Jesus

Context is everything

2010-12-14T22:29:00.002+08:00

I remember hearing this song at an event to help victims of abuse. Normally I would have thought it was a rather cheesy song, but in this context, it was really poignant

So you could give me wings to fly
And catch me if I fall
Or pull the stars down from the sky
So I could wish on them all
But I couldn't ask for more
'Cause your love is the greatest gift of all

How Lincoln's depression helped him

2010-11-05T17:23:00.002+08:00

Learning from Lincoln

Shenk gives compelling historical evidence for Lincoln's life long struggle with depression but also shows that the depression gave Lincoln three key qualities.

Firstly it gave him clarity. For example, Lincoln saw slavery for what it was, something "founded in the selfishness of man's nature (and), opposition to it, ___his love for justice." Shenk correlates Lincoln's clarity with modern psychiatric literature that recognizes "depressive realism, the sadder but wiser effect." Pain gives clarity.

Next, Lincoln's depression gave him creativity. His literary prowess is well documented, the Gettysburg address being but one example of his work. Shenk concludes that Lincoln's "overwhelming melancholy fed into a supple creative power, which allowed him not merely to see the truth of his circumstances but to express it in a stirring, meaningful way." Shenk notes that the correlation between mental illness and creativity is fairly well documented.

Finally, Shenk sees that Lincoln's suffering kept him humble. The many griefs of his life fed this sense of humility. Lincoln was always clear that God was the captain of life and that he was at most a sailor allowed to work on the deck of God's ship.

...

Shenk concludes that "Lincoln didn't do great work because he solved the problem of his melancholy; the problem of his melancholy was all the more fuel for the fire of his great work." One can only wonder as to what would have happened if Lincoln had access to Prozac.

The relationship between wisdom and age

2010-10-02T18:11:00.002+08:00

Generally, it is believed that people become wiser with age, and all things being equal, I would agree that this is true because the more experiences a person has, the wiser the person will become. However, I would argue that if people are close-minded and always follow traditions, then as they age, they will become more stupid because they will just accumulate more and more illogical ideas about life. By the time they die, they would have become walking oxymorons.

To those who may have come here after a long time

2010-08-21T22:24:00.004+08:00

I'm not as angsty as I used to be. But I'm still Canopy, older now. Thank you for being a part of who I am today. Thank you for your kind words. Thank you for your words of wisdom on life, religion, love, hope. Thank you for sharing your quirky observations. I have enjoyed discussing things with you. I wish you well, and hope the intervening years have been as blessed for you as they have been for me.

Joke on spirits

2010-07-24T22:29:00.001+08:00

A minister of a city church enjoyed a few drinks, but his passion
was for peach brandy. One of his congregants would make him a bottle
each Christmas. One year, when the minister went to visit his friend,
hoping for his usual Christmas present, he was not disappointed, but
his friend told him that he had to thank him for the peach brandy from
the pulpit the next Sunday.
In his haste to get the bottle, the minister hurriedly agreed and
left. So the next Sunday the minister suddenly remembered that he had
to make a public announcement that he was being supplied alcohol from
a member of the church. That morning, his friend sat in the church
with a grin on his face, waiting to see the minister's embarrassment.
The minister climbed into the pulpit and said, "Before we begin,
I have an announcement. I would very much like to thank my friend,
Joe, for his kind gift of peaches...and for the spirit in which they
were given!"

Entries from the Devil's Dictionary (Ambrose Bierce)

2010-06-12T23:01:00.003+08:00

army
a class of non-producers who defend the nation by devouring everything likely to tempt an enemy to invade

autocrat
a dictatorial gentleman with no other restraint upon him than the hand of an assassin

belladonna
in Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues

cerberus
the watch-dog of Hades, whose duty it was to guard the entrance - against whom or what does not clearly appear; everybody, sooner or later, had to go there, and nobody wanted to carry off the entrance

conceit
self-respect in one whom we dislike

conservative
a statesman who is enamoured of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal, who wishes to replace them with others

deluge
a notable first experiment in baptism which washed away the sins (and sinners) of the world

elope
to exchange the perils and inconveniences of a fixed residence for the security and comfort of travel

famous
conspicuously miserable

fidelity
a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed

gallows
in this country (America) the gallows is chiefly remarkable for the number of persons who escape it

grave
a place in which the dead are laid to await the coming of the medical student

harbour
a place where ships taking shelter from storms are exposed to the fury of the customs

historian
a broad-gauge gossip

PBSD

2010-05-24T00:10:00.004+08:00

the man: You should sue them for physically scarring you for life.
the woman: No, I've better things to sue them for.
the man: For psychologically scarring you for life?
the woman: No. For psychologically scarring YOU for life.

The Lord is Peace

2010-04-30T11:44:00.002+08:00

Philippians 4:7 "God's peace, which is so great we cannot understand it, will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus."

"The Lord came to Gideon and told him he was to lead his people in victory over the Midianites. That's like God telling a housewife to stand up to her abusive husband or a high school student to take on drug peddlers or a preacher to preach the truth to a congregation of Pharisees. "Y-y-you-b-b-better get somebody else," we stammer. But then God reminds us that he knows we can't, but he can, and to prove it he gives a wonderful gift. He brings a spirit of peace. A peace before the storm. A peace beyond logic....He gave it to David after he showed him Goliath; he gave it to Saul after he showed him the gospel; he gave it to Jesus after he showed him the cross. And he gave it to Gideon. So Gideon, in turn, gave the name to God. He built an altar and named it Jehovah-shalom, the Lord is peace (Judges 6:24)." ---Max Lucado

Conscience

2010-04-24T14:33:00.002+08:00

We are taught from young to obey our consciences. But I wonder how many people realise how much our "conscience" is influenced by prevailing societal values. For example, in the past, many societies believed that slavery was an acceptable practice and few people would have felt guilty for owning slaves. It took lots of campaigning by freedom fighters before the society's conscience was changed. I think we spend the majority of our lives trying to decide which of our values need to be changed, adapting our lifestyles to avoid violating new-found values and healing from old harmful values.

Quote of the day

2010-03-03T13:48:00.001+08:00

Out beyond ideas of wrong-doing and right-doing, there is a field. I'll meet you there.

Lest we forget how vulnerable children are

2010-02-13T19:38:00.002+08:00

How great distances
Can seem when you're a sitting
Duck or a beached whale

Sec sch lit essay on Lord of the Flies

2010-01-27T10:33:00.000+08:00

Compare and contrast Ralph and Jack as leaders. Who is the better leader?

Ralph is a democratic leader but Jack is a dictatorial leader. Ralph’s power lies in the conch that calls the boys to assemblies. Whoever holds the conch has the right to speak, no matter how young or insignificant that person is. This shows that Ralph values everyone as a human being who has the right to be heard. He tolerates the boys’ differences and is willing to hear them out patiently. Jack, on the other hand, controls the boys by terrorising them. He has no respect for human life and individuality. He cannot stand the power the conch gives the person who is holding it and usurps its authority as much as he can, saying that some people should keep quiet and leave the talking to others. Ralph’s leadership style is much more fragile than Jack’s because it depends on the conch and the boys can decided to not recognise the authority of the conch anytime they choose to....Read more

Logical fallacies

2009-12-05T18:56:00.002+08:00

Is it a logical fallacy to say that it is OK to base life decisions on logical fallacies because logic is not that important?

The epitome of progress

2009-11-02T10:44:00.002+08:00

Slave's descendant ends up in the white house

Research into the family of US First Lady Michelle Obama has revealed that her great-great-great-grandmother was a slave given away at the age of six.

According to genealogist Megan Smolenyak, the girl was described in papers only as "negro girl Melvinia".

In her early teens, working as a slave on a farm in Georgia, she was made pregnant by an unknown white man.

The son she gave birth to around the year 1859, Dolphus, was Michelle's great-great grandfather.

Megan Smolenyak, whose discoveries have been detailed in the New York Times newspaper, said she was not surprised by what she discovered.

"But the fact that just 15 years after the death of Dolphus, one of his descendants was born who would end up in the White House, that is startling," she said.

"If I had known"

2009-10-09T22:51:00.001+08:00

If I had known that on that day our time was near the end
I would have done things differently, my forever friend.

I would have stayed right next to you deep into the night
But I thought I'd see you in the early morning light.

And so I said "Good-night" to you as I walked in through the door
Never thinking of the time when I'd see you no more.

But if I had known that on that day our time was at the end
I would have done things so differently my forever friend.

Grateful

2009-09-08T17:12:00.000+08:00

Dear God,

Thank you for giving me friends who share my convictions about helping the oppressed and who are willing to stand up for what they believe in. Thank you that I never have to feel alone.

A Raging Moderate

2009-08-28T11:42:00.001+08:00

by C. David Hess

I really believe that the old saying, "labels are libels" is true, but that does not stop me or others from using them.

When I first moved here I described myself to Al Ford (for a newspaper article he was writing) as "a fundamentalist with a liberal veneer." One of our members told me recently that she thought I had it backwards. I am actually a liberal with a fundamentalist veneer.

I don't really mind wearing either label as long as I can define the terms. There are all kinds of both liberals and fundamentalists. The biblical scholar who approaches scripture with the unquestioned presupposition that the miraculous cannot and does not ever occur is just as much a fundamentalist as anybody else. I have known some pretty close minded "liberals" too (a supposed contradiction in terms).

Another label that I have been trying on myself lately is "raging moderate." I say "raging" to make it clear that I am a moderate out of conviction. Moderates generally are suspected of having no or very lightly held convictions or of being lukewarm. I'm a hot moderate.

I have become even more comfortable with this choice of personal label after reading the confession of M. Scott Peck in his book, Further Along the Road Less Traveled: "I never thought I would be a middle-of-the-road anything, and here I've found myself a middle-of-the-road Christian. And as bad as that might sound, it is good, I've decided. It is not fence-sitting. It is a path of tension."

Often (but not always--we moderates are fond of qualifications) those at the poles of a particular debate (e.g. pacifism vs. militarism, pro-choice vs. pro-life) wish to avoid tension (at least the inner variety). Thus they often try to make thinks simpler than they in fact are. We "raging moderates" embrace the path of tension, as uncomfortable as it is, because we recognize that many of the issues we face are too complex for simple formulation, even for the application of labels.

Quote from Spiritual Disciplines Handbook

2009-07-23T14:34:00.002+08:00

"Respecting our bodies (including their limitations) is a way God communicates his council and will to us. Our tiredness reveals that we are not infinite beings. We need boundaries. We need rest. We need to say no as well as yes. We need to know that what we can do sometimes, we cannot do all the time."

A fairytale come true

2009-07-21T21:40:00.001+08:00

Lost love letter reunites couple after 16 years

LONDON (AFP) - - A British man and his Spanish former sweetheart have finally married 16 years after they drifted apart, reunited by a love letter lost behind a fireplace for over a decade, reports said on Monday.

Steve Smith and Carmen Ruiz-Perez, both now 42, fell in love 17 years ago when she was a foreign exchange student in Brixham, southwest England, and got engaged after only a year together.

But their relationship ended after she moved France to run a shop in Paris.

A few years later, in a bid to rekindle their love, Smith sent a letter to her mother's home in Spain. It was placed on the mantelpiece, but slipped down behind the fireplace and was lost for over a decade.

The missing missive was only found when builders removed the fireplace during renovation work.

"When I got the letter I didn't phone Steve right away because I was so nervous," Ruiz-Perez told the Herald Express local newspaper.

"I nearly didn't phone him at all. I kept picking up the phone then putting it down again.

"But I knew I had to make the call."

When they were reunited, it was as if time had stood still, said Smith, a factory supervisor.

"When we met again it was like a film. We ran across the airport into each other's arms. We met up and fell in love all over again. Within 30 seconds of setting eyes on each other we were kissing.

"I'm just glad the letter did eventually end up where it was supposed to be," he said, after the couple married last Friday.

Good will ultimately triumph over evil

2009-07-08T18:27:00.002+08:00

The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me,
because the LORD has anointed me
to preach good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners,
to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,
and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the LORD
for the display of his splendor.
They will rebuild the ancient ruins
and restore the places long devastated;
they will renew the ruined cities
that have been devastated for generations.

Isaiah 61:1-4

Sorrow

2009-07-06T22:28:00.000+08:00

"Starting with the death of my brother, each person who left my life forever took with them a piece of my life that they created. The holes can never be filled by another person; each new friend adds to my life but never replaces those lost. Instead, those holes fill with sorrow.

Sorrow is a liquid and rests at the lowest points of my soul. It's thick like oil and sticky like syrup. When left alone its surface thickens like the skin on hot milk. In that state it can fill the emptiness without spilling into every area of my life, but when jabbed or stirred by a memory, a photo or a fresh pouring of sorrow into my being, its presence and its pain scald the empty chambers where people's lives once were.

But the pain is no longer a shock; I've known its arrows so many times before. And the presence of the disturbance is better than the lonely void it would leave if I could somehow exorcise myself of my sorrow. So the sorrow remains -- pools of pain in the grotto of my heart, memorials to the fallen, proxies for the missing. It fills the emptiness, keeps me company, keeps me from being alone. Where there would be only a stark and barren valley, there is instead a lake on whose shores I can walk with the memories of my brother, my friends, my family.

Where in my life there has been a trail of losses and good-byes, where there were family and friends who now are no longer with me, where there was pain and anger at the sadness of separation, now there exists in my soul a balm made from the very emotion of separation, now there is a comfort I so fondly call my Wonderful Kind of Sorrow." ---Brian Elroy McKinley

Maybe this is where all those alien stories come from

2009-06-29T11:33:00.001+08:00

Opium-eating wallabies get high, make crop circles

Not all who wander are lost

2009-06-16T15:36:00.003+08:00

There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

(Ecclesiastes 3:1-8)

Just heard this in church the other day. I find it very comforting to be reminded that just because things may look inconsistent and unstable on the surface doesn't mean that something is wrong. What is right for today may not be so for tomorrow. Projects follow natural lifecycles. Sometimes we have to try new things and sometimes we have to take stock and focus. What is right for one person may be wrong for another. There is a time for mercy and for justice. Ruins must be cleared away for new life to grow. Sometimes we have to unlearn before we can learn. Sometimes the desires of the strong must be denied in order to meet the needs of the weak. I can celebrate today's joy while still honouring yesterday's sorrow. There are some people who are more deserving of my empathy and loyalty than others. Even peacemakers have to go to war sometimes; while soldiers learn to lay down their arms.

Mentoring

2009-06-10T09:01:00.002+08:00

I remember that when I was in my teens, I always wanted a mentor, but I could never find one. After a while, I gave up and my friends and I just muddled along as best we could.

When I look back, I realise that it was all for the better, because I learnt how to build relationships based on equality and mutual support, rather than some kind of hierarchy.

Now whenever I hear about top down mentoring schemes where there are well-defined roles of mentor and mentee, I find that it doesn't speak to my needs because I prefer a "peer mentorship" system where both parties get to learn from each other. I feel that this is the way humans are meant to grow: together.

Quote of the day

2009-05-26T11:14:00.000+08:00

If you want to go fast, go alone. But if you want to go far, go together.

Quotes from The Scandal Of Evangelical Politics

2009-05-16T21:13:00.003+08:00

Pg 99: Voting for, and otherwise promoting the election of, a specific politician in no way means accepting or endorsing all of that person's ideas and actions. It only means that one thinks that politician's platform and likely activities will be a little less destructive than those of other candidates.

Pg 109: Justice does not merely help victims cope with oppression; it removes it. Because of this dynamic, restorative emphasis, distributive justice requires not primarily that we maintain a stable society, but rather that we advance the well-being of the disadvantaged.

Breakdown by Daughtry

2009-05-14T21:51:00.008+08:00

I just discovered this song and it has shot into the top 5 list of songs I want to play at my previous church.

Open up the book you beat me with again.
Read it off one sentence at a time.
I'm tired of all the lines,
Convictions and your lies.
What right do you have to point at me?

Read it all, no need for separating here.
You see what you want and try to justify.
All your little lines,
Convictions and your lies.
What right do you have to point at me?

Well, I'm sitting alone thinking about it all over coffee.
And still crowdin' my space are the things you still hold against me.
You cannot save me.

Well, it's not the time to breakdown.
It's not the time to breakdown.
It's not the time to break up this love,
Keep it together now.
It's not the time to break.

Another song on my top 5 list would be Angels by Within Temptation.

Dreamt I was walking around in a very blue place

2009-05-08T23:18:00.002+08:00

The color blue symbolizes reason and intelligence. If you see a refreshing blue sky in your dream, it is a good omen. It is a sign that your concentration or imagination is rising and you might have a chance to discover something new about yourself. Also, if an acquaintance wearing blue clothes appears in your dream, it indicates that you’ll be able to solve your problems when in trouble by asking him or her for help.

Depending on the context of your dream, the color blue may also be a metaphor of "being blue" and feeling sad.

Yahoo! Singapore

2009-05-01T19:49:00.001+08:00

Yahoo! Singapore:

Inside Yahoo! Singapore Search
It's the Long Weekend!

No plans? How about visiting some farms in Singapore?
�Find out more!

Hmm, saw this on yahoo. Now doesn't seem like the most appropriate time to be seeing pigs. Maybe this is some kind of automated search thing that comes up with advertisements based on the most frequent searches made by Singaporeans, and since people are searching for "swine flu", it thinks that people want to see swine in the farms.

7 social processes that grease the slippery slope of evil

2009-04-26T14:23:00.003+08:00

Some time ago I watched a video of a lecture by Dr Philip Zimbardo, who ran the Stanford Prison Experiment. Dr Zimbardo got a bunch of young men to volunteer as research subjects. He randomly divided them into 2 groups, with 1 group playing the role of prison officers and the other group the prisoners. He also constructed a makeshift prison to hold the prisoners, then told the prison officers to manage them. Within 6 days, violence between the prison officers and prisoners had escalated to such a great extent that the experiment had to be prematurely terminated from the original planned duration of 2 weeks.

Dr Zimbardo later became an expert witness in the Abu Ghraib trials. In his lecture, he talks about how ordinary people have the capacity to be both heroes or monsters when they are given power, and it is largely a matter of how they choose to respond to circumstances. He also discusses the ways in which people are pressured to commit atrocities by authority figures. He elaborates on his theory of 7 social processes that lead to evil, namely:

1. mindlessly taking the first small step
2. dehumanisation of others
3. de-individuation of self (anonymity)
4. diffusion of personal responsibility
5. blind obedience to authority
6. uncritical conformity to group norms
7. passive tolerance of evil through inaction, or indifference

Quote of the day

2009-04-12T14:06:00.001+08:00

The significant problems we have cannot be solved at the same level of thinking with which we created them. --Albert Einstein

Hesed: quotes from The Gospel of Ruth

2009-04-10T10:16:00.004+08:00

According to what we have seen, hesed can be boiled down to this: Someone cares and has freely made it their business to look out for you.

Naomi had to find God's hesed in the middle of the mess. The dark night of the soul is an awful place to be, but that's where God trains his best warriors. Although Naomi looked and felt as if her life was being dismantled and she was being put out of action, God was actually raising her up and equipping her for a mission-critical assignment in his kingdom.

Integrity

2009-04-05T15:56:00.001+08:00

Our integrity sells for so little, but it is all we really have. It is the very last inch of us, but in that inch, we are free.

- V for Vendetta

The only way out is up

2009-03-31T20:27:00.002+08:00

Last night I dreamt I was climbing up a rocky slope next to the sea. After a while I felt I couldn't go on so I decided to go back the way I had come up. But somehow when I looked around and saw the waves crashing against the rocks I knew I would die if I tried to turn back. So I looked up again and realised there were metal railings for me to hold on to. I proceeded to climb up the railings and got tangled in some thin ropes that were messily stretched across them. At first the ropes supported my weight and made me feel safer, but after a while they tangled tightly enough to hurt badly and I had to stop and unwind them. It took a lot of unwinding because there were lots of knots at my back but finally I got unstuck and climbed up to safety, although my back was still hurting a bit from a knot that had been sticking into it.

Quote of the day

2009-03-29T18:33:00.002+08:00

“Break a vase, and the love that reassembles the fragments is stronger than that love which took its symmetry for granted when it was whole.” --Derek Walcott

Walk away

2009-03-15T18:20:00.001+08:00

Dae Jang Geum (translated "Jewel in the Palace") is a TV drama serial about a girl who entered the Korean palace as a royal cook and rose through the ranks, eventually becoming the first female to be the king's personal doctor. She was motivated by the desire to become Head Lady of the Royal Kitchen, so that she could get hold of some record book passed down from one Head Lady to the next and rewrite the entry to reflect an injustice that had been done to her mother while her mother was a royal cook.

It always bothered me, while watching the show, how the characters were so obsessed with official versions of the truth that they could spend an entire life's work trying to rewrite official records. Why not just acknowledge that sometimes evil people are in charge of documentation and leave it at that? Why should one particular narrative, written by a liar, have to hold so much authority? It's a different matter if investigation is ongoing and the people involved can influence their fates by influencing what others believe. But in this show, the characters try to rewrite their own version of events decades after the original dust has settled, which seems to me to be not worth the risk. In the end, people have to face their own consciences, and being judged right or wrong by others is not the main issue.

When I say I am a Christian

2009-03-07T09:07:00.002+08:00

poem attributed (maybe wrongly) to Maya Angelou

When I say.... "I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin'."
I'm whispering "I was lost,"
Now I'm found and forgiven.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need Christ to be my guide.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak
and need His strength to carry on.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
and need God to clean my mess.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible
but, God believes I am worth it.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain,
I have my share of heartaches
So I call upon His name.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner
who received God's good grace, somehow.

Reflection questions for 2008

2009-03-04T17:44:00.005+08:00

1. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Obama

2. What kept you sane?
my friends; knowing that I can make a difference in this world

3. What was your favourite film of this year?
none :-(

4. What song will always remind you of 2008?
Hurricane by Eric Benet:

Standing here in disarray
A calm serenity
The winds of change can devastate
And it took this much for me
With nowhere to run and no reason left to hide
Gonna hold on
All the walls around are broken down
Now I can hear the rising sun

Surrounded by everything I want
But nothing that I need
I was blinded by the absurdity
Losing all identity
Sometimes what you fear the most is what you need
To find that road
Right around that curve a lesson learned
Now that I have the eyes to see

A hurricane, a hurricane
Is sometimes the only way to wash away the pain
A hurricane, a hurricane
Is sometimes the only thing that brings you back again

With poison toys I'd isolate
But the wind was strong and true
But now I see where the treasure is
'Cause they only blocked my view
I'm spiraling down but so oblivious
Got to find my way home
There's a heart that bleeds trapped in me
But how do I break this shell of stone

A hurricane, a hurricane
Is sometimes the only way to wash away the pain
A hurricane, a hurricane
Is sometimes the only thing that brings you back again

Sometimes I cried, the tears wouldn't fall
And sometimes I tried to break those walls
And feel your love
But I came alive
When I finally found my way

5. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learnt in 2008.
Don't fall for someone else's definition of success.

The night has a thousand eyes

2009-02-18T06:54:00.001+08:00

The night has a thousand eyes,
And the day but one;
Yet the light of the bright world dies
With the dying sun.

The mind has a thousand eyes,
And the heart but one:
Yet the light of a whole life dies
When love is done.

--Francis William Bourdillon

Still going strong but

2009-02-14T11:55:00.002+08:00

I feel like I am
In the middle of a plot
So thick I can't breathe

"A woman is like a tea bag

2009-02-03T07:16:00.000+08:00

You never know how strong she is until she gets into hot water."

I have often heard it said that we can tell what a person is like when s/he is under stress. However, I feel that the truest test of character comes when a person is given power.

Most people who have lived long enough would have found ways to deal with stress and just because they survive well doesn't necessarily mean anything. But when people are given power, we can see how they regard humanity in general because they have free reign to treat others as they please. We can see their real priorities, what they choose to do when they can do whatever they want.

Been dreaming about boats

2009-01-10T15:06:00.001+08:00

In the first dream, I was in a rowboat with a nasty guy I used to know and we were fighting and trying to kill each other/throw each other into the water. Then my friends arrived in a bigger boat (with a small shelter and all that) and pulled me into their boat.

In the next dream, I was with (probably the same) friends and running away from an erupting volcano that split the ground apart. I got separated from them and ran into a school, where I started to pick up pieces of paper because I suspected that I would find things written on it that I wanted to know about. However, the first piece of paper I picked up was blank, and before I could read any other papers, a security guard appeared to try to stop me. I punched him and ran away and then I was running through gardens and forests and people were chasing me. I ran to a beach with lots of black stones and tried to make it onto an extremely colourful boat with a playground on it because it seemed to have lots of hiding places. Strangely enough, the sea level was higher than the land and waves kept breaking onto the black stones and flowing down to me, which was quite frightening and prevented me from reaching the boat.

Quote from Spiritual Disciplines Handbook

2009-01-10T14:44:00.001+08:00

For Jesus prayer seems to be a matter of ... trusting that love is the bottom stream of reality.

--Richard Rohr

Quote from "Free of Charge"

2008-10-28T20:52:00.002+08:00

The only way to ensure that we will not lose our very selves if we give ourselves to others is if our love for the other passes first through God...if we love and enjoy others in God.

Safari Spy

2008-10-04T11:21:00.002+08:00

I am trying to
Solve the mystery of why you
Are so interesting

Quote of the day

2008-07-24T11:01:00.000+08:00

I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love. --Mother Teresa

Just a disclaimer here: I believe that we need to be wise about who to stack all of our bets on...

Worship, Community, Mission

2008-07-12T16:27:00.002+08:00

I recently finished reading a book called "Life After Church: God's call to disillusioned Christians" by Brian Sanders. In this book, Brian outlines the minimum conditions he feels are required before a gathering of people qualifies as a "church". (He calls it the "ecclesial minimum".) For him, a church must consist of
1) worship --to acknowledge and follow the one true God
2) community --relationships with other believers
3) mission --reaching out to those who need help

Being the kind of person who often needs negative examples in order to understand what something is, I find it very helpful that the author describes what different permutations and combinations of the above 3 qualities would look like:

a) just worship --groups of people who gather somewhere to worship, then return to their own lives
b) just community --social occasions
c) just mission --independent, self-directed ministry
d) worship and community --nonmissional churches which emphasise programmes for believers and grow by Christians transferring in from other churches
e) worship and mission --parachurch organisations with high turnover rates
f) community and mission --secular humanitarian agencies

Sympathy captured

2008-06-22T21:03:00.000+08:00

'Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are only princesses waiting for us to act, just once with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love.' - Rainer Maria Rilke

Quote from "The Journey Towards Relevance:

2008-06-14T14:45:00.002+08:00

simple steps for transforming your world" by Kary Oberbrunner

Even Paul, the seasoned saint, learned a vital lesson. He was so against John Mark joining the missionary efforts that he forbid him to come. John Mark deserted him once before and he was not going to take any chances again (Acts 15:37-40). Later in his ministry though, Paul recognised that John Mark was useful (2 Timothy 4:11). I guess we all make mistakes.

PhDs Exempt From China’s One-Child Policy

2008-04-19T17:32:00.000+08:00

Top 100 April Fool's Day Hoaxes Of All Time

In 1993 the China Youth Daily, an official state newspaper of China, announced on its front page that the government had decided to make Ph.D. holders exempt from the state-imposed one-child limit. The logic behind this decision was that it would eventually reduce the need to invite as many foreign experts into the country to help with the state's modernization effort. Despite a disclaimer beneath the story identifying it as a joke, the report was repeated as fact by Hong Kong's New Evening News and by Agence France-Presse, an international news agency. Apparently what made the hoax seem credible to many was that intellectuals in Singapore are encouraged to marry each other and have children, and China's leaders are known to have great respect for the Singapore system. The Chinese government responded to the hoax by condemning April Fool's Day as a dangerous Western tradition. The Guangming Daily, Beijing's main newspaper for intellectuals, ran an editorial stating that April Fool's jokes "are an extremely bad influence." It went on to declare that, "Put plainly, April Fool's Day is Liar's Day."

The enemy stronghold

2008-03-16T08:46:00.003+08:00

I've been having dreams in which I'm wandering through scary places. Normally, when I dream I'm fighting with some enemy, there are clearly defined territorial boundaries, and if I have to leave the secure areas, it is always with a view to going back once the mission is accomplished. But lately I've been having dreams in which I'm in the enemy stronghold and I'm trying to find someone or something good to rescue, and I don't even know what it is.

Links update

2008-03-01T15:51:00.001+08:00

I've been doing lots of Internet research on human rights, and on the left side of this page you can see a list of organisations I've identified which I believe are doing good work.

Trench warfare

2008-01-20T08:26:00.000+08:00

In an earlier post, I wrote about how liberalism and conservatism are part of a spectrum and defined relative to each other. Of late, I've been thinking of the middle part of the spectrum --the people who have almost similar beliefs but choose to label themselves on opposite sides. I think I even know people who call themselves conservative but are actually more liberal than people who call themselves liberal. Like trench warfare in WW1, the people in the middle probably have it worst. The "enemy" is so close that you can see how human s/he is, you have to fight with the whole range of people on the other side, and worst of all, you might even take a bullet or two from the extremists on your own side.

Talk about the prevention being worse than the cure...

2007-11-24T04:41:00.000+08:00

Malaria - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Vaccines for malaria are under development, with no completely effective vaccine yet available. The first promising studies demonstrating the potential for a malaria vaccine were performed in 1967 by immunizing mice with live, radiation-attenuated sporozoites, providing protection to about 60% of the mice upon subsequent injection with normal, viable sporozoites.[93] Since the 1970s, there has been a considerable effort to develop similar vaccination strategies within humans. It was determined that an individual can be protected from a P. falciparum infection if they receive over 1000 bites from infected, irradiated mosquitoes.[94]

An egg I can't lay

2007-10-15T21:06:00.000+08:00

Been feeling uncomfortable these last few days, because there are things I want to give to a particular person that I have no opportunity to.

Question of the day: Where does trust come from, and where does it go when it has died?

The boomerang effect

2007-09-29T12:07:00.000+08:00

Having come into contact with many people who have weird cultic ideologies, one strange thing I have noticed is that these ideologies can be quite easily flung back in the faces of those who espouse them. All it takes is a little ingenuity to use their beliefs against them. I would go so far as to say that if I cannot use a person's ideologies against him, his ideologies are probably quite sound.

A haiku

2007-09-15T09:33:00.000+08:00

Torn apart, but the
Tendrils of my heart are still
Wrapped around your frame

Perfect love

2007-08-10T13:44:00.000+08:00

At my previous church it was taught that as long as a man loves a woman perfectly, she will definitely be willing to marry him. At that time I thought it was some kind of sexist assumption that woman are passive responders to those around them; that women's preferences are not important etc. But I'm beginning to realise that so much hinges on the definition of "perfect love" that this belief might be accurate, though not in the way that the leaders in my previous church meant, because...

Everyone, whether male or female, has a different idea of what love looks like in its perfection, and of how they want to be treated by those closest to them. It is very hard to find someone whose ideal of love is similar to one's own, and even harder to find a person who will live it out perfectly. If perfection does not exist, then the statement "If a man loves a woman perfectly, then she will be willing to marry him" is logically true because a statement that consists of a premise and a conclusion will always be true if the premise is never true. The above statement is comparable to "If penguins can fly, then I am the king of Singapore".

I think the main reason I was so disturbed by what they told me at my previous church was that I was subconciously using what I understood to be that church's definition of love, which is something like "condescending care that does not really respect the object of one's love". I knew I would never want to marry a person who carried out that ideal of love perfectly! So now I realise that the solution is not so much to refuse to respond to "perfect love" as to question the definitions and assumptions behind the words used.

Things are bad when...

2007-08-03T06:39:00.000+08:00

I'm helping my friends to come up with military strategies in my sleep --by interpreting my dreams.

Domestic violence rates higher at Christmas

2007-07-29T16:28:00.000+08:00

BBC NEWS | Wales | A&E plan to help violence victims

A police domestic violence unit is being set up in a hospital's accident and emergency department over the Christmas period.

Detective Inspector Simon Davies said the increase in reported domestic violence incidents over Christmas was related to people drinking more.

Quote from "The Scandal of the Evangelical Conscience"

2007-07-27T11:46:00.000+08:00

Today, unfortunately, many people despise Christians, not for their unswerving obedience to Christ, but because of the hypocritical disconnect between Jesus's teaching and our actions.

Good memories of bad relationships

2007-07-14T18:54:00.000+08:00

The strain of thought I always seem to hear is that people are unable to settle comfortably into new relationships because they are haunted by bad memories of past relationships that have broken up. But I find that what really scares me are not the bitter memories, but the good ones --remembering closeness and intimacy, some shared adventure, a good joke, a feeling of absolute trust. Because these memories tell me how illusive happiness is, how love in its present form might only be a deception. And so I don't dare to trust my judgement; I am constantly waiting for the axe to fall.

Quote from "The Bible Jesus Read" by Philip Yancey

2007-07-01T10:23:00.000+08:00

The victims of the concentration camps did not dare succumb to meaninglessness, for only an enduring faith in meaning kept them alive.

An old article about the SDU

2007-06-13T16:45:00.000+08:00

Singapore plays matchmaker, hoping to boost its birth rate: Asian Wall Street Journal

Here's an interesting fact from the article:

Speed Dating is an idea swiped from a rabbi in Los Angeles who saw it as a way of keeping his flock from marrying outside the faith.

The Marriage Mystique

2007-05-24T21:12:00.000+08:00

Whenever I read books on marriage, especially Christian guide books, I always feel like I'm reading about another species, one in which its members can plan their lives and execute everthing right on schedule, including what kind of person to marry, when to get married, where to live, what job to take and how many children to have. It's amazing how well the people described are able to following a stereotypical life plan.

Somehow I can never pretend that I will ever stand in the shoes of these people. The relationships that resonate with me are those which I read about in unusual books, for example, Leah and Anatole in The Poisonwood Bible, Ella and Char in Ella Enchanted, or the two main characters in To Trust A Soldier. I can't imagine a peaceful life. I rather fear the future, but I fear getting stuck in a straitjacket even more...

What's wrong with blogger?

2007-05-24T21:11:00.000+08:00

This is the first time I've been able to get in in a long time!

Liberty and security, love and respect

2007-05-07T00:17:00.001+08:00

Benjamin Franklin once said, "Anyone who trades liberty for security
deserves neither liberty nor security." I think the same could be said of
love and respect, that he who thinks respect is much more important than
love will get neither.

This would make a really cool wedding song

2007-04-24T11:20:00.000+08:00

I have leaned on the wisdom of men
O Lord forgive me
And I have responded to them
Instead of Your light and Your mercy
But now O Lord I see my wrong
Heal my heart and show Yourself strong
And in my eyes and with my song
O Lord be magnified
O Lord be magnified

What happened to the blogger search?

2007-04-23T20:29:00.000+08:00

This is going to cripple my investigative abilities...

If you come softly

2007-04-20T14:40:00.001+08:00

If you come as softly
As the wind within the trees
You may hear what I hear
See what sorrow sees.

And if you come I will be silent
Nor speak harsh words to you.
I will not ask you why, now.
Or how, or what you do.

We shall sit here, softly
Beneath two different years
And the rich earth between us
Shall drink our tears.

Hunting for particular kinds of books

2007-04-02T17:09:00.000+08:00

I get cravings to read particular kinds of books the way other people get cravings for a particular food. These days I find myself going for picture books a lot, let's say, books on home office design. I think it's because I'm busy writing my thesis so I want to look at books that don't involve too many words.

Jumpy

2007-04-02T00:54:00.000+08:00

I keep flinching at ordinary things. A person on the street asking for donations to charity. An MRT service announcement. My sister popping her head into a doorway. I wonder if it's some PMS thing.

Costumes

2007-03-20T12:57:00.000+08:00

My sister likes to search through my wardrobe for costumes for her plays. I wonder what that says about the clothes I wear.

Nice book ideas

2007-03-17T12:43:00.000+08:00

How to Keep a Scrapbook of Your Favorite Books - eHow.com

While I generally don't understand the impulse behind scrapbooking --it seems like a lot of work to create a record of something I already know I am --I like the idea in STEP 10: Take notes about what features the perfect book should have. I think this would come in useful if I ever decide to write a book. So this is my list --

Good features in fiction books:

deals with the big issues --love, freedom, courage, friendship
nice descriptions of material culture --clothes, homes, food
has insights I haven't thought of before
has insights I thought I was alone in having
has a concern for liberating the oppressed
humourous
well defined characters
depth of emotion
does not flinch from depicting how horrible the world can be
does not promote stereotypes

Good features in non-fiction books:

nice colourful pictures
well-researched
information laid out concisely and systematically
does not contain too much technical jargon
has useful ideas that I can't think of on my own

The axis of life

2007-03-13T16:02:00.000+08:00

I am about to make decisions that will throw my life seriously off the beaten track. I know I have my reasons, but those reasons dwell in a place I usually visit only in my dreams or in the eyes of my friends. I hope I will have courage, now. It doesn't help that some of the people most responsible for shaping me into who I am today would be furious at the use I have put to their advice. I tend to use the things people teach me in ways they would violently object to. I learn by negative example. Not sure if that is a good thing, but I can't imagine any other way to go through life.

The one word that best describes my thesis:

2007-03-13T15:46:00.000+08:00

STUCK

The second best two words to describe my thesis:
TOO SHORT

Should have seen this coming

2007-03-06T16:11:00.000+08:00

Washington Bill Would Require Married Couples To Have Children

Under I-957, marriage would be limited to men and women who are able to have children. Couples would be required to prove they can have children to get a marriage license, and if they did not have children within three years, their marriages would be subject to annulment.

My challenge to you is: guess who proposed this bill?

Newbery and Carnegie Medals

2007-02-13T12:09:00.000+08:00

The Newbery and Carnegie Medals are the most prestigious children's book awards in USA and UK respectively. I was browsing through the list of award-winning books and I couldn't help noticing that the UK books are, on the whole, a lot darker than the US books. The Newbery books that I've read include

The Tale of Despereaux: Being the Story of a Mouse, a Princess, Some Soup, and a Spool of Thread
Holes
The Midwife's Apprentice
Walk Two Moons
The Giver
Shiloh
Jacob Have I Loved
The Westing Game
Bridge to Terabithia
Roll of Thunder, Hear My Cry
Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH
The Witch of Blackbird Pond

These are all books that have a strong bias towards the "happy ending" camp, even if they are sad in between.

The Carnegie award books I've read include

His Dark Materials: Book 1 Northern Lights aka The Golden Compass
The Scarecrows
Watership Down
The Last Battle

These books are much more unsettlingly open ended; they leave you wondering and wandering through dark thoughts. There are actually other books I've read from the list, which I can't quite remember the stories of. Whereas for the Newbery award list, I tend to remember the books, even if they weren't that good. I think the Newbery award winners tend to be more finite and clear-cut in terms of storyline and overall themes.

I wonder what this means with regard to the cultural differences between US and UK.

Wandering heart

2007-02-12T11:09:00.000+08:00

If you really want
To follow your heart, you will
Pay the fare in blood

Why "all mankind loves a lover"

2007-01-27T12:11:00.000+08:00

It has been said that parents are inherently conservative because they will not feel the thrill that their children get from doing something dangerous but they will feel the pain when things go wrong. When it comes to observing others' romantic relationships, the opposite scenario probably holds true. People feel the thrill of watching developments in the relationship but they will not have to bear the consequences when things go badly. I guess that's why magazines are full of news about the relationships of celebrities.

The broken vase and the phoenix

2007-01-27T10:29:00.000+08:00

I know some people who view themselves as fragile vases that, once broken, can never be put together again. Such people recover badly from failed relationships, bitter conflicts, depressing events etc. Or rather, they don't recover at all. But there are other people who see themselves as phoenixes. They go down disastrously in the flames every now and then, but are reborn from the ashes. I must try to be more like them. Which is why we all need God. Because only God has the power to give new life.

Liberals and conservatives

2007-01-25T10:13:00.000+08:00

Liberalism and conservatism are part of a spectrum; they are defined relative to each other. I've been thinking that this fact would give rise to a paradox where if I want to think of myself as liberal, I would have to choose an environment in which people are more conservative than I am, and if I want to think of myself as conservative, I would have to hang around with liberals. It seems like a fight is unavoidable. I wonder how other people deal with this contradiction.

Lessons learnt from the exam results leak --good analysis by Hooked magazine

2007-01-17T11:19:00.000+08:00

1. NUS students really worry about their results ~ how else can one explain the furore surrounding The Leak??

2.There are about 2 degrees of separation between all NUS students ~ It is believed that there are 6 degrees of separation between every single person in the USA. In NUS, everyone has a "Friend of a friend" who knew about the leak.

3. Virtually all students are linked by MSN Messenger ~ Perhaps the government should think about harnessing MSN for anti-terrorist drills, considering the vast web of interconnectedness it provides youths.

4. Undergrads go nocturnal during the school holidays ~ Word of the Leak was especially widespread in the wee hours of 1-3am, indicating that students don't burn the midnight oil for studying only.

5. NUS is a big place, but if one thing links its students, it's the grades ~ Students of different faculties may not always have opportunities to interact, but if there's one thing that makes NUS an "imagined community", it's the mystery of the C-A-P.

6. The oft-cited quote "I hope my grades will be moderated up" should be relegated to the realms of wishful thinking ~ Dude, if your results are BBBCC, they're probably gonna stay that way. Fact.

7. NUS Computing students don't have to look too far for jobs when they graduate ~ The Leak, together with the recurring CORS problem, demonstrates the need to improve our school's computer systems, pronto!

8. If you STILL don't know about the leak... you either live under a rock, or you've got no friends.

Rising activism among Jews

2007-01-13T11:42:00.000+08:00

Israel and the Jews | Second thoughts about the Promised Land | Economist.com

An ambitious attempt to resist assimilation and the loss of Jewishness is the “birthright israel” programme, sponsored by a group of Jewish philanthropists, which since 1998 has given over 100,000 young Jews from around the world a free ten-day trip to the country. It aims less to promote aliyah than to give an instant hit of Jewishness. Surveys show it works. Mark Hanis, an Ecuadorean-born 24-year-old who did the trip in 2001, calls it “transformative”, a word Jewish leaders love. “The big impact for me”, he relates, “was seeing children in the streets playing soccer like you always saw in Ecuador, but wearing yarmulkes instead of crosses.”

Ironically, though, many returning birthrighters have embarked on a search for new ways of what is colloquially called “doing Jewish” that have little to do with Israel or even religion. A lot of it is based on tikkun olam, literally “world repair”, the Jewish duty of social activism. Thus Mr Hanis, the grandson of Holocaust survivors, decided that Jews have a duty to fight genocide, and founded the Genocide Intervention Network, a campaign against the killings in Darfur. A young leaders' conference, ROI120, ambitiously decided, at its first meeting last summer, to create “the cultural expectation that Jewish youth will spend a year engaged in social service” after finishing school. The American Jewish World Service, which works on everything from microcredit in El Salvador to women's rights in Rwanda, has more than doubled its intake of volunteers in the past four years.

Singaporeans are not adults

2007-01-08T08:56:00.000+08:00

but foreign workers are

Mr Wong also said the entry levy of S$100 would not apply to foreign domestic workers who wished to enter Singapore casinos.

He was responding to a query in Parliament on whether foreign maids would be charged the S$100 required for Singapore citizens and Permanent Residents entering the casinos.

Mr Wong said as adults, foreign domestic workers would be responsible for themselves.

As the waves subside

2006-12-23T14:46:00.000+08:00

Away from conflict
For too long, my battle scars
Are disappearing

The last poll is the best

2006-12-14T20:11:00.000+08:00

Mister Poll: Should guys have to wear long hair "up" in lab like girls?

Thoughts from Philip Yancey's book

2006-12-05T21:56:00.000+08:00

"The Jesus I Never Knew"

If Jesus had lived during the Spanish Inquisition, he would have been executed for hindering the church's work.

Religion, not irreligion, accused Jesus; the law, not lawlessness, had him executed.

Jesus' healings are not supernatural miracles in a natural world. They are the only truly natural things in a world that is unnatural, demonised and wounded.

The attributes of resilient people

2006-12-01T10:36:00.000+08:00

taken from "Learning from resilient people" by Morley D. Glicken

they are open to new ideas, new directions and new pathways to resolve life crises
they do not dwell unnecessarily on the past
they have high aspirations e.g. for academic achievement
they take full responsiblity and do not blame others for their problems --they have a strong internal locus of control
they desire to help others, not because they feel obliged to but because they believe it is a positive outlet for the wisdom they've gained as survivors of traumas
when disaster strikes, they take the initiative to seek help from true friends in order to get their lives back on track
they learn from others and believe that there is great wisdom to be gained from their day-to-day interactions with people
they use creativity as a way of expressing inner feelings and intense emotions
they enjoy taking personal risks to see if goals can be accomplished
they are introspective and insightful about themselves and others; they try to see connections between events and their responses to them
they choose to assimilate with a culture which has values that will be helpful to them
they show a strong degree of social responsibility and a desire to leave a positive legacy for future generations
they share a sense of curiosity and adventure with significant others, particularly children

Can you tell that I'm feeling a bit weak? It must be the wrong time of the month.

More about dreams

2006-11-23T13:25:00.000+08:00

from Can I cause another person to dream? | The Register

"In a study conducted by Dr William Dement, a professor of psychiatry at Stanford University, it was found that dream deprivation produces anxiety, irritability, an inability to concentrate, paranoia, a ravenous appetite, depression, and even suicidal thoughts."

I think I should go diagnose my friends now...

Dream interpretation is scary

2006-11-20T08:58:00.000+08:00

Last night I dreamt I was in an empty log cabin, which was joined to other cabins like a terrace house. It was snowing gently outside, and I was glad to stay inside and wander around in the warmth of the internal hallway that joined all the cabins. The only problem is that some of my neighbours seemed a little noisy and intrusive. I managed to avoid talking to them. I walked around in my little room and noticed a door at one side. I opened it and inside was a bare kitchen with closed cupboards lining the four walls, painted a brilliant white, which contrasted jarringly with the wood hues of the rest of the cabin.

I stumbled across a dream interpretation website this morning. These are some of the entries:

Snow is a symbol of a new life, good changes, coldness and frost. Walking on a crispy snow and seeing snowflakes fall means that positive changes and improvements are going to happen in your life. Seeing melting snow: you will solve a vital problem, or a problem will disappear by itself.

There is not much significance to a hallway other then denoting an abnormal period of worry and concern, so this dream should be interpreted using the other symbols in the dream and reserving hallways under, "worries".

In our waking lives neighbours can either be a good help or a complete nuisance. If you dream of your neighbour, it could be a sign that somebody is gossiping about you. Speaking to a neighbour means that you are about to be involved in a confrontation.

The kitchen symbolizes your emotional life, this is a place where you can be creative. The kitchen almost always reflects the need to work through your current situation using your heart rather than your head.

White in a dream might possibly be a reminder to resolve special situations and problems. White is feminine, symbolizing virginity, but also emotional coldness and immaturity.

Wood is a symbol of opinions, habits, ideas that you have been raised with.

Afraid

2006-11-06T22:59:00.000+08:00

I sometimes have the ability to read people, to know their needs before they speak, to see the pain hidden between the lines. I don't know why the ability comes in its full fury or why it sleeps at times. But I do know that it could land me in a lot of trouble. Not just because some people do not like others intuiting their thoughts, but because others read too much into it. They might think there is a special connection between us, when it is something I could produce with almost anyone I wanted to. Maybe the specialness is in the wanting.

If only

2006-11-04T18:36:00.000+08:00

I saw this interesting morsel of info in the book Church Without Walls by Jim Petersen.

"If we could somehow pass a law that all ideas needed to be tested in the laboratory of the author's life before they got any further, the world would be spared most of its pain --and the information glut we now swim in would slow to a trickle. Theology as a discipline is especially vulnerable to being perpetuated without being tested in the matrix of life..."

Unfortunately, I know of a lot of people who have tried out ideas that caused harm and then continued using those ideas, usually with some kind of rationalisation e.g. that it is not important for people to be happy, that they are not applying the ideas correctly etc. And so it goes...

Cursed

2006-11-04T10:14:00.000+08:00

But there lay the embroidered letter, glittering like a lost jewel, which some ill-fated wanderer might pick up, and thenceforth be haunted by strange phantoms of guilt, sinkings of the heart, and unaccountable misfortune.
---Nathaniel Hawthorne, "The Scarlet Letter", Chap 18: A flood of sunshine